I hope you enjoy today's entry as we feature another secret for your enjoyment, thrills, chills, and possibly appalling reactions. I tried to keep it under 500 words for each day's entry. Come see what we have in store for you today in a fictional character's own words...
You can check out previous secrets from A-Z by clicking here
PNR boxedset Prowlers & Growlers
My biggest secret, and the one I wish I could keep, is that of my gender. I appear as feminine as I am able, but constantly fall short, seen as transsexual. Neither is my enjoyment of BDSM closely guarded from prying eyes. I have frequented a club, had my body displayed, even when I most wanted to hide it.
No, my secret is born from my past. Outwardly, I declare my forgiveness for those who hurt me. They called me horrible things, did things to me… No child should ever endure what I endured. However, if we are to grow, we must move beyond retribution and vengeance to reconciliation and peace. So, with many visits to many therapists, I have done so. I work in pharmacology, trying to help others like myself, to give them more complete transitions from male to female or vice versa.
The secret, which I don’t even admit to my partner, David, is how much I still hate those boys. How much I want to hurt them in the ways they hurt me. I want to tear off their clothes, beat them and fuck them with foreign objects. I want them to bleed.
But, that just won’t do. I want to live my life, to move beyond that pain. I have admitted it, I have shared my wounds and scars and I can get past this. I just have to swallow that pill and wait for it to dissolve.
I hope that pill doesn’t fester there. Who knows what it might become.
(Changes: Getting What You Wish For answers that question and address its manifestation. Find Jacqueline’s Heidi in Prowlers & Growlers!)
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